Even If Your Child Doesn’t Ask This Question on MLK Day, Answer It Anyway
My 7-year-old son loves school, so his question on the way home from Walmart this weekend didn’t surprise me.
From the backseat came the question that I hope every parent answers – even if they are not asked.
“Why do we have school off on Monday?”.
I dove right in as we cruised North, on the highway, back to our small town where seeing someone who looks like Martin Luther King Junior is rare.
Vermont is 94% white and less than 2% black. (Source: US census)
Intentional parenting matters when it comes to talking about race and making sure that my son’s role models include Black Americans. That’s why his wall has photos and life lessons from some of the most extraordinary human beings.
On that drive home, I was intentional about the conversation that we had. I knew this moment was important.
We talked about Martin Luther King Jr. He knows more than most first graders because of the “I am” books that fill his bedroom shelves.
That discussion led to Harriet Tubman, Rosa Parks, Jackie Robinson and Abraham Lincoln. We talked about the Underground Railroad and the Civil War. We talked about plantations and slaves being brought over from Africa against their will.
My parenting is very intentional when it comes to teaching him about our past and his choices now as a human being.
Martin Luther King Jr.
“An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.”
My intentional parenting reflects Dr. King’s lesson about humanity. There was something else that happened at Walmart that day that led to an important conversation.
We’re very fortunate to be able to provide a lot of security and extras for our little guy. This comes with a great responsibility to raise a child who understands his responsibility to help others.
He is learning, and so am I.
When we got to the checkout, like so many kids, he started asking for treats. I said “no” because I want him to understand that money has value and it takes hard work to earn it.
Then he said something that I’ve never heard him say before.
“This one is cheap,” he said, as he held up a pack of gum. “It’s only a dollar and six cents.”
I said “no” again and we left the store.
That night, as we snuggled in bed, I talked to him about what he said.
I told him that the cashier, who checked us out, works hard and may not think $1.06 is cheap.
I told him that some people needed a dollar to buy a can of soup for dinner and that we need to respect each person wherever they are at.
On Martin Luther King Jr. Day, and the other 364 days each year, we must be intentional about how we move through this world.
As a parent, it is vital that we show our children the way, just as Dr. King showed us.
Children's Books
One of the best tools that I have in my “intentional parenting tool box” is historically accurate books written at a child’s level.
Honest Answers
Don’t shy away from hard conversations and honest answers. A child’s empathy grows as they understand what other people go through.
Exposure
Part of my intentional parenting is bringing my son places where I know there will be children from different cultures and different races. I also seek out performances that highlight African, zydeco and other music that exposes him to cultures from all over the world.
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